The Ethics of Love Magic

Now that I have Witchlings to teach I look at everything with a degree of caution. How could this go wrong? What backfires easily? What can we avoid to keep them safest? It occurred to me that every time I look at books to potentially buy for any new witches I jump straight to see if love magick is included.  

There are a couple different types of love magic, but if you don’t know what you’re doing it can backfire easily and cause years of grief. I have used love magic a whole of once. It blew up in my face, because I didn’t know what I was doing, and I’m still living with the consequences 9 years later (granted I did a double no-no by mixing love and blood magics, but that just shows how little I knew what I was doing). The biggest problem with the spells where you attract (or create) love, it is seen as a breach of free will to cast a love spell on someone, and if you aren’t careful it can lead to obsession or lust, not actual love. That’s the trap I fell into. But there are some types of love magic that don’t fall into any gray areas. 

Self-love spells can be very beneficial for people who struggle with self-love. It’s all about you for this type of love magick, so as long as you consent to what you’re doing for yourself ethics don’t have to be a thought. Self-love magick is great for those who suffer from most mental illnesses, and it can be just a good way to remind yourself to be kind to yourself.  

Relationship strengthening spells or rituals are ethical only if any and all parties agree to it. Consent and free will are the concerns for ethics in love magic, so if everyone gives consent and took part in the casting it will not only give you a better, more organic result, it’s less likely to backfire and cause unwanted levels of lust or obsession.  

Ever since having my kids, and even more since starting this blog, I’ve thought about ethical magick, and safe beginner level magic. Now that I’m actively trying to teach a couple people, I look at everything differently again. I don’t consider love magick beginner level, even some of the self-love stuff can be stronger than new witches are expecting, and any spell can go wrong no matter how long you’ve been in your craft. It’s disconcerting how googling things like “types of love magick”, or “love magick ethics” still bring up mostly lists of spells to attract, keep, or bind(the page wouldn’t load on my phone, and my computer is currently impossible to get to, or I’d have a rant for that too) love. Even published books of spells have all those “bring love to you” traps.  

To any and all new witches out there, as always do your research and reach out to the community before diving in head first. We’d all rather everyone be safe when practicing magick, and I don’t think any question is a stupid one. I know I’ve seen a few creators on TikTok (yes, the clock app consumes my life periodically) that don’t like answering basic, easy to research questions, but I think that’s more damaging than helpful. Not everyone is good at or has the patience for proper research. Those people need somewhere to turn to help them sift through all the information, and I will gladly be that person. 

I will gladly answer any and all questions to the best of my ability. If I don’t know the answer, I’ll help find it!  

Have any of you ever tried any kind of love spells? Did it work as intended? Did it backfire? I’d love to hear your stories!